2020; The Year We Forgot To Live

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Every piece of article I have read so far about a review of the year 2020, has been written in almost the same pattern. 99% at least. We truly have all had a fair share of the baggage this year brought along. Almost like Santa Claus to be very honest. Because how best would you explain a year that had something for everybody.

Where would I even start writing this piece from? Should I start from the crossover night into 2020, where I sat in church almost in tears, but constantly muttering to myself that “God, please let this not be the year I end it”. Or maybe I should start from the fears I had, the tears, the fights, the total reset of plans, the emotional moments, the realization that Nigeria is fucked up and there is very little I can do to change that right away. Crazy.

A lot has happened this year that we all didn’t plan for. No one predicted we would all experience this shit. The Covid 19 pandemic with over 1,502,253 deaths. The lockdown. Loss of jobs. Loss of loved ones. The protests; #BlackLivesMatter and #EndSars. Australian bushfires. Stock market crash. Beirut explosion. Chadwick Boseman’s death. West Coast wildfires. Earthquakes in Turkey. A locust swarm outbreak in East Africa. Gas plant explosion in Lagos. A lot of the bad stuff.

But if there is one thing a lot of us didn’t do despite the crazy year is to actually LIVE. We all got caught up in our worries that we never really took the time to pause, breathe, and just live.

To live is to be in the moment. To live is to smile at the very little things. To live is to dance in your confined space or dance while walking back from work. To live is to find the little things around the environment to be grateful for. To live is to wear that gorgeous smile on your face a lot more than the frown. To live is to take deep breathes. To live is to have cold or warm baths (whatever works for you) on gloomy days. To live is to forget the sad moments and grab a glass of wine to binge-watch your favorite series.

See, we all are about to step into a new year, and I think it’s time we sit back to ask ourselves these tough questions;

  • What have I always wanted to do?
  • What do I feel like doing right now?
  • What is that one thing or things I would love to do but wouldn’t because of the fear of what everyone would say?
  • Who am I pretending to be really?
  • If I traveled to a new country without anyone staring at me, who would I be?

Ask yourselves these questions and answer them honestly. You would most likely realize you’ve been a fraud to yourself and living a lie. Or perhaps, you’ve just been living the 1% of the kind of life you desire with the hope of a future where you finally would be free.

….

If you take time to think about this deeply, you would realize that tomorrow is not promised, hence the need to live today. You can go on and write out goals for the new year ( again, whatever works for you). How to hit a financial target. How to work harder than last year. How to win the staff of the year award. How to get married. How to start a business. etc. Go on, write them down.

I only beg of you that you create a space for doing every damn thing you love. Nothing too deep or too serious. Every damn thing! Write it down in caps and underline it. If it’s just to save the address of the places you intend to go to, save it. If you intend to watch a certain amount of movies this year, note it down. Even if you desire to get laid, honey…you already know what to do. Add it to your goals.

Live. Breathe.

We know it is difficult to ‘human’ as an adult. It is even more difficult to ‘human as an adult’ living in Lagos, Nigeria. We all should accept this and know peace. Accept it that the government cares less about your survival. The economy cares less about your salary. Your employers care but they are in this messed up system, hence, transfer of a sprinkle of hardship. Everything is almost out to frustrate your dreams. So why not just live? Live and do the little things that would make you happy now.

I know it seems this article is all out to remind you of the realities you’re trying to run away from. You can deny it but it is getting to me too. I just want my days on earth to really count. I don’t want to miss out on the things I really would love to explore for a future that I can only guess and pray for.

How to stay happy or how to live and breathe would have been the perfect way to wrap this up, but then only one phrase keeps coming to my head. It just fits. It’s a blank cheque waiting for you to fill. It is the most repeated phrase in this article. Pretty simple.

Just Live and Breathe.

Here’s to a fruitful 2021!

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I love to talk and write, and this is my perfect space. Wanna talk? Send a mail- precious.bekha@gmail.com

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